Who would have thought that despite being happily married, I
would be dating again?
That’s what this
whole finding/meeting a surrogate feels like.
It started out much like online
dating.
Surromomsonline and
allaboutsurrogacy are just like Match.com minus the pics.
There is another site,
findsurrogatemother.com
that is even more like Match because it does have pictures as well as a place
to describe yourself and why you’re looking for a surrogate/intended
parent.
After perusing through the prospective
matches, you send an email and hope that you get a response.
Surrogates send you emails too.
Like Match.com, you are often emailing with
more then one person at a time.
In fact,
I got such a good response to my blog/video that I was initially overwhelmed
with a few potentially good matches.
That is, until my surro wrote me back and told
me she was interested.
When I first started corresponding with my surro it felt
really reminiscent of when I first met Jason.
I found myself getting excited when I would receive an email or text
from her. I would carefully craft my
responses, hoping to make a good impression.
I so wanted her to like me and didn’t want to say anything that might
turn her off. And just like when I first
met my husband, with each contact I began to like her more and more. In the beginning, our texts were much more
business-like and surrogacy-related but as we got to know each other better we
began texting about our interests and our lives. After a long texting or facebook instant
messaging session I would find myself on a high. I also noticed that my mood would be affected
when we weren’t in contact. Over the weekend we would often go a couple days
without being in touch and I noticed that I was a little off but wasn’t sure
why. Then on Monday I would get a “How was your weekend?” text and it would put
me in a great mood.
And now, I’m about to go on my first real date with my
surro! She “asked me out”on Sunday,
inviting me to go for dinner/drinks with her sisters-in-law. I was thrilled to be invited and of course,
said yes. But now I ‘m getting first
date jitters!!!! What if things aren’t
as great in person as they are over text/email/FB? What if her family doesn’t
like me? Worse, what if she doesn’t like
me? I’ll be the odd man out since they
all know each other so well- will I fit in? Whatever should I wear????
I can’t tell you how much it means to me that she has
invited me to meet her family. When we
first started this process, I didn’t want to find just anyone to carry our
child. I had hopes that I could find someone that I would really get along
with- someone who I would remain friends with beyond the pregnancy. I never imagined I would find someone who I
liked this much. And I am honored that
she likes me enough to want to introduce me to the important people in her
life. I really hope that I make a good
impression.
I know I’m being silly and am sure it will all be fine. Since it’s a girls night, I won't have Jason
to rely on for a safety net. However, I
know that we have already started to build a strong connection over text/email. I can’t tell you how many times she texts exactly what I am thinking! I’m
sure that will translate IRL (that means
In Real Life- I learned that from my surro! )