With transfer day quickly approaching I find myself in a surreal position. Leading up to transfer day, I am typically getting daily shots of progesterone to prepare my uterine lining, doing acupuncture at least weekly to balance my hormones, and doing all I can to prime my uterus for conception such as refraining from alcohol, eating healthy, doing fertility yoga and listening to Circle and Bloom fertility meditations. This time, it's not my uterus that will be carrying this baby so I don't have to do any of those things. Some may think this is a good thing. Just sit back and let someone else do the work for a change. For me, not so much. In these situations where I am completely powerless about the outcome, I have learned that I do best when I find ways to empower myself by doing something. (Hence all the yoga, meditation, etc).
So what can I do to prepare for transfer? I decided to put
my energy into coming up with the perfect transfer day gift package for Ellen and her husband, Chris. I learned via FB posts and blog posts that
in the surro world, it's typical to give your surrogate a gift upon
transfer day. A transfer day gift is usually a basket with goodies,
sometimes jewelery, sometimes matching green socks, etc. Some folks
even wear matching t-shirts with sayings like the standard "Our bun" and
"My oven" shirts or the more original "
Sometimes it takes three to tango" and "My Threesome was Crazier than Yours"
t-shirts. I scoured the internet for some ideas and came up with a few
of my own. Since we are all college sports rivals, we decided it would
be fun to plan a transfer day package around that. We wanted to get Ellen a Georgia Bulldog maternity t-shirt, especially since if all
this works, she will be needing maternity clothing come football
season. I couldn't have been more pleased with this shirt that I found.
We put some other fun stuff in the package too, like this great little book
Which pretty much sums up how I feel about Ellen...
We also included the obligatory pineapple core. Pineapple core is one of those "Old Wives Tales" that is supposed to help with implantation, although there is actually some science behind it. Pineapple contains large amount of bromelain, which is a nutrient that is an anti-inflamnatory which seems to increase cervical mucas (TMI?) This can make the uterus more sticky which can lead to increased rates of implantation. Most of the bromelain is foudn in the core of the pineapple, so the recommendation is to cut the core into five equal pieces and eat one piece a day starting on the day of transfer. I did this for all of my transfers and IUI's and hoped Ellen would do the same.
We also put in this silly little gift ( a walking hen who lays little gumball eggs!) We figured it was appropriate since we're hoping she's our Momma Hen who will be sitting on our egg keeping our little chick warm until it's ready to be delivered.
We added a little good luck charm- a jade rabbit necklace that was lent to me fairly early in my TTC journey by Jason's mother. If I remember correctly, a long-time friend of her's had some trouble conceiving and found this rabbit in Chinatown which helped her get pregnant with her daughter. Years later, her daughter had trouble conceiving as well and she gave her the charm. She, too, had a baby. While the charm never worked for me (or at least never stuck) I hoped Ellen would have better luck with it.
Finally, we put it all together along with some magazines and some goodies from Trader Joe's like dark chocolate pretzels, hummus, and these chocolate peanut butter bars that she had posted about on Instagram. This is the finished gift basket.
We
couldn't leave her husband Chris out since he plays a big role in this
as well. Jason and Chris had already discussed their mutual love of
IPA's so I found a cooler backpack and Jason filled it with some of his
favorite beers. We got Chris a Georgia t-shirt, which as it turns out,
is a lot harder to get in Georgia when it isn't football season than you
would think! Jason had actually ordered one he liked on-line weeks
prior but for some reason it never showed. We scrambled to find one
that wasn't a golf shirt or really ugly and despite looking in Target,
Ross or TJ Maxx we coudln't find any that we liked. Jason even looked at
the mall in Footlocker, Champs, Nike and various department stores.
Surprisingly, we found a decent one at the dollar store of all places,
so got that along with a giant Georgia beer mug. We're hoping he enjoys
his gift as well (and that he drinks the beer AFTER he gives Ellen her
shots!). Stay tuned for the rest of our transfer plans....
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